I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
CEOs are now playing miniature golf.
Exxon-Mobil had to lay-off twenty-five Congressmen.
I bought a toaster oven; and my free gift was a bank.
Angelina Jolie adopted a child *from America*.
Motel Six won’t leave the light on anymore.
A picture is now only worth 200 words.
They renamed Wall Street: “Wal-Mart Street.”
When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.
Thanks to Scott Compton for sharing this with me.
If President Truman were still in office, the sign on his desk would read, “The Dime Stops Here”…
We can’t even get the chicken to cross the road.
Baskin-Robbins now has just 3 flavors.
Heinz is down to 48 varieties.
Exxon is offering to put a stray calico in my tank.
Whole Foods is changing its name to Half Foods.
I’ll stop now.